Frequently Asked Questions

1. QUESTION:
   Are wedding wishing wells ever acceptable?
   I know most people think of wishing wells at a wedding as tacky and that it is wrong to ask for money. My fiance and myself have considered one for our wedding, however…not because we want to ask people for money, but because we know some people will want to give something anyway and we literally don’t have the space or the need for any appliances, towels, bedding, etc. We’re both in our 40′s and have each lived alone for years. We already have too much even for just one of us as it is. I would hate to receive gifts that I know I can’t use and then have to sell or return them. I know we could specify no gifts, and that is definitely another thought. I know word of mouth is a great way to express that we’d prefer cash or gift cards (even grocery store cards), but we’ll be getting married quickly and there wouldn’t be much time for word of mouth to get around. We would use the money to help toward the purchase of a new sofa. Suggestions? (no criticism…it’s advice I’m looking for, not judgment. We haven’t decided to go that route yet.)

   • ANSWER:
     Honestly, I would not worry about receiving unnecessary gifts. People are pretty keen on assessing a couple’s situation when it comes to giving gifts. People are going to figure you don’t need anything “traditional” because of your age. I’m in my 20′s and I even know that an ideal gift for you would be cash, considering your older and more established.

     So, my personal opinion is don’t have a wishing well, because they’re inappropriate. Give your guests credit and trust that they’ll make the best decision on their own.

2. QUESTION:
   Opinions on wedding wishing wells?
   Im getting married at the end of the year and have started our planning
   We are thinking of having a wishing well and somehow letting people who were planning on buying a gift – if they would mind giving a gift-card or money instead?
   We have a good reason for this -My Partner and I are having our wedding in my home town and so we have to fly in and with luggage restrictions and breakables we thought this would be a good option for us and we cant cart our bags, our son and a bunch of wedding gifts across 3 states.
   Will people be offended by this ?
   i see peoples point in a regisrty – but what does one pick to ask people to buy ,my partner and i have been together many years and have a child and set up house – i find it more tacky asking people to buy me certian thingson a registry than using a wishing well – would it be less tacky to ask people to post a gift if they liked or give them the option of a money / gift-card well or a gift with postage??
   im not after money – im just trying to make it easy on everyone

   • ANSWER:
     I don’t see how people would be offended by it.

     I’ve been to plenty of receptions where they have a similar thing…a mailbox type of thing were us guests put cards with money in it.

     I’ve also been to receptions where they do the Dollar Dance. The guests pay to dance with the bride and groom. And that’s fun because everyone gets to dance.

     Friends of mine did something like this and they recouped almost all of their wedding expenses from it.

     But, as a person previously answered, having the items on your registry shipped directly to your house would work too.

3. QUESTION:
   How do you make a small tabletop wedding wishing well without wood?
   It will be used at a funeral reception for a baby not at a wedding but it is the same concept. Does anyone know where I can find directions on making one?

   • ANSWER:
     Sad that the use will be a funeral reception for a baby. We made one for a baby shower, but you can use the same idea. We used sheets of Styrofoam to create a little slanted roof and those were held up with 4 Styrofoam slats which connected to a box we constructed with styrofoam. The well itself was square, though, not round. You can cover the styrofoam with fabric, you can stick in silk flowers or you can cover it with wrapping paper to suit your theme. I think we found the directions on the Martha Stewart Living site but that was years ago. Condolences.

4. QUESTION:
   How much money should one put in a wedding wishing well and should it be put in annonymously or inside a card?
   Recently went to a wedding, guests were unsure what was the rule of thumb.

   • ANSWER:
     First off, definitely a card, personalized from you to them. As for the amount, it depends on You. You should at least be able to cover the meal(s) which usually comes down to about 20-40 bucks a person, depending on how over the top the wedding is. But, that’s really just a rule of thumb, because no one can blame you if you are a student or younger with a mediocre job and not throwing cash their way…but they’d surely like it.
     Sometimes, you just put in what you can afford…and how close you are to the person getting married. I’ve just made it a rule of 100-200 depending on if my wife cares for the person or not.
     You have to figure, all these monetary gifts offset the price of the wedding, honeymoon and other expenses that went into having the wedding.
     Hope that Helps

5. QUESTION:
   Can anyone help come up with a poem for our wedding wishing well?
   My fiancee and I are getting married in September and are having trouble deciding on a wishing well poem. I grew up on a dairy farm and we are having a milk churn instead of an actual well. We can’t really decide on any poems so were hoping to make our own including something about the milk can. We rent at the moment would appreciate any money which we intend to save for a house.

   • ANSWER:
     We’re tacky and rude
     So we’re throwing this bash
     So that you’ll line up
     And give us your cash

6. QUESTION:
   Does anyone know a poem for a wishing well for wedding?
   we would like help to buy a new car. Everyone we know knows that we need a car that doesnt break down every 2 days so we would love to put it in a poem for our wedding wishing well

   • ANSWER:
     Where are you from? Wishing wells are considered tacky in the United States but acceptable in other countries.

     I have to say though your priorities are odd, you don’t have money for a car but you do for a wedding? I’d scale back on my wedding if I needed a car, a wedding is 1 day a car gets you to work & back, everyday.

7. QUESTION:
   WHAT DO I DO WITH WEDDING WISHING WELL?
   I have ask for wishing well for my wedding but I don’t know what to do or to have byside that, what do guest do when they turn up, The only thing I know is I have to get a wedding well box, is there any thing els that i should know or have, or do on the day? can anyone who have the experien tell me please.

   Thank you.

   Nang

   • ANSWER:
     You should throw the whole thing in the trash. It will just be seen by your guests as an attempt to shake them down for money after they have already given you a gift.

8. QUESTION:
   What do you think wishing wells and wedding bans have in common?

   i meant wedding bands

   • ANSWER:

9. QUESTION:
   what do you think wishing wells and wedding bands have in common?

   • ANSWER:
     They’re both rip-off’s designed to do one thing – take your money!

10. QUESTION:
    I’m trying to write a poem for my wedding wishing well?
    please help. I don’t want to be rude and just ask straight out for money but we have been together for 11yrs and have 2 kids so we would like money for the honeymoon. If someone could help me write one like i said we have 2 kids, live on a farm out in the country (casual wedding) not sure if this can be included in the poem?

    • ANSWER:
      We’ve shacked up for years on end,
      Had kids, yep two, yet never wed.
      We’re greedy and selfish and haven’t a clue
      What proper etiquette would guide us to do.
      We finally decided to tie the knot,
      So after all the gifts you’ve brought,
      If you’ve got cash then what the hell,
      Stuff it into our wishing well.

11. QUESTION:
    Wedding wishing well, do you put money in envelop or in card/envelop with who from?
    Invited to wedding with a wishing well (where you give money instead of a present) do you
    a) put money in envelop annonimously or
    b) put in a card saying who from then in envelop

    • ANSWER:
      you can put it in the card with your name on it. or and envelope but not annonimously, put your name on it along with a message like congradualtions, ect..

12. QUESTION:
    Wedding wishing well poem please?
    I need a wishing well poem to go on wedding invitations for a couple who already have a baby. Anyone know of any good ones?

    • ANSWER:
      Does the baby part really matter?

      http://www.bridesofaustralia.com/Wishing_Well_Wording_Poem.html

13. QUESTION:
    Where can I buy a small wishing well for my wedding?
    I’ve been looking online for a small wishing well for my wedding. I’ve seen some great ones that have a lid and lock on the top but they are all in Europe and the shipping is expensive. Any suggestions for somewhere around the Washington, DC area? Size I’m looking for should at least 20 cm in diameter. I’m not looking for a big one to put in the garden. Just something that will sit on the gift table that is big enough for cards.

    • ANSWER:
      This might work for you: You will need some card board and a utility knife, As well as a hot glue gun and some fabric to go with your theme, or just plain white with some ribbon. Since this is only for cards, don’t worry if its perfect! You could even use plywood if you have someone who can cut it for you. First, make a box shape, it does not have to have a bottom, just a top with a slit in it big enough for cards. Then use two dowel rods or even a bunch of spray painted sticks to hold up the top…if you use sticks, bundle them togeter with wire, and then spray paint them silver. then cover up the wire by gluing ribon bows on top. now make a roof by cutting two squares and taping them togeter with stong packing tape. Now, cover your project with the fabric you choose, making sure to glue it or staple it to the underside where no on can see.. Asemble toget her with hot glue,. Any edges showing can be coverd by gluing ribbon on top of the edge. Add lighting to complete it!

      If you are not crafty or this sounds like too much work, submit an order to my site, and I can make one for you. Submit your details in the contact us tab. I can also do unity candles, floral, and some centerpiece. Check out my site, http://carlielleflowers.webs.com/ I could do the wishing well for 0

14. QUESTION:
    Help with wedding wishing well problem?
    My partner and I have been together for 8years and have been living together for 5years.
    We are getting married in october and we would really like for our guests to give money as a gift as we are going to donate it to charity. The problem is my partner wants to put one of those poems on the wedding invites and i personally feel that is really cheeky.
    I have bought a wishing well for the wedding reception but not sure how to ask for money instead of gifts without sounding cheeky.
    Please help

    • ANSWER:
      A couple options.

      1. Get yourself a website and then in the place where you would usually give out registry information, put the information about how to give to the charity of you and your fiance’s choosing. Go to:

      http://www.idofoundation.org/

      for more information. LOTS of couples are doing this nowadays and it is perfectly acceptable.

      2. With the invitations, include a small card that says something to the effect of,

      “We have been truly blessed in our lives and have already built our home together. While we appreciate the generosity of all of our friends and family, we do not have the household needs of a young couple just starting out. If you are inclined to make a gift, we suggest that you make a donation to [insert name of charity]. This is an organization that we support because [insert personal connections to the charity, or brief explanation of their work].”

15. QUESTION:
    How do I ask guests to bring gifts from my wedding registry for my shower and have a wishing well reception?
    We just bought a house and would rather have pots and pans than panties and bras. However, I still want a wishing well for our wedding. How do I word this on the invites? Is that tacky to say or should I exclude any info from either of the invites?

    • ANSWER:
      no one really gets lingerie for bridal showers anymore. unless that’s the theme of your shower. most likely your girls will bring you lingerie for your bachelorette, but not the shower. whoever throws your shower will just put on the invites the name of the store where you’re registered. then for wedding gifts, most people will bring cash or gift cards to the reception and a few might bring you more gifts you registered for.

16. QUESTION:
    Wedding Wishing Well Poem About Babies?
    I read this wishing well poem a few months ago about the pitter patter of feet or something to do with babies, I cant really remember much else just that it had the words pitter patter in it and it was a wishing well to put money towards starting a family. If anyone could help me out I would appreciate it a ton!

    • ANSWER:
      I just wanted to comment because of the arogant person who wrote the first answer. don’t listen to prats like that. wishing wells are very common now. especially in australia (where I am) i have spent hours today looking up wishing well poems for our own wedding and i’m sorry to say I haven’t seen one referring to babies in any way. good luck. have a great wedding!

17. QUESTION:
    What’s the polite way to word that you only want $ for the wishing well for ur wedding present?
    I would like to know the polite way to word (not on the invite, on another card in the envelope) to say that you only want $$ or vouchers for a wedding present and that there will be a ‘wishing well’ at the reception that they should put it in.
    Some out there may think I’m rude – (sophie wouldn’t have been invited anyway! – take the cake for rude!) I appreciate any advice RELATING to the question, not ur personal opinion. Remember what your mum always said, “If you dont have anything nice to say, dont say anyhting at all”.

    • ANSWER:
      what is the point in recieving gifts if you already have everything you need….that is where a wishing well comes in handy…… you don’t need doubles or triples of everything….all the weddings i have been to have all had wishing wells / treasure chests as they already have everything…..so put this poem in with your invites

      our treasure chest
      more than just kisses so far we’ve shared,
      our home has been made with love and care…
      most things we need we’ve already got,
      and in our home we can’t fit alot…
      a treasure chest we thought would be great
      (but only if you wish to participate)
      a gift of money is placed in the chest,
      then make a wish…..but shhh don’t tell!
      once we’ve replaced old with new,
      we can look back and say it was thanks to you.

      seriously it is your choice to whether you want a wishing well or gifts…..my partner and i are getting married next year and we will be having a wishing well as we have everything we need…the house and everything in it and a family ( 3 young children)
      don’t worry about what anyone else say’s it’s your own decision in the end

18. QUESTION:
    Where can I find examples of suitable verses for using a wishing well at my wedding reception?
    This will be both of our 2nd wedding, we have everything we need. We thought about doing a honeymoon registery. That isn’t going to happen. Now we have decided that for those family members and friends that would like to contribute to us we will provide a wishing well at the reception so that any monetary gifts can be left there along with cards and wishes. I can’t find a place online that provides verses used to let people know in a tasteful way that this is what we are going to do. Please help!

    • ANSWER:
      Here are some websites that I hope you like. I think they are good. For the websites just print them onto a seperate piece of paper (a really nice fancy paper if you wish) and then stick it inside the invitation.

      http://www.thecapodimonteshoppe.com/Wishing_Well_Poems.html

      http://www.ultimatewedding.com/poems/get.php?action=getarticle&articleid=325

      http://forums.weddingsolutions.com/showthread.php?t=2835

      http://mag.weddingcentral.com.au/weddings/wishing_wells/index.htm

      I hope this helps you out a little bit. We did this for a bridal shower and it went over great! We just used a flyer because it was for church so we didn’t need invitations but the wishing well was really nice. Here are some websites that have the wishing wells in case you don’t have that:

      http://www.members.optusnet.com.au/~s.beaumont/index.htm

      http://cgi.ebay.com/ELEGANT-ITALIAN-CHEST-WISHING-WELLS-Wedding-AC-ST-TM_W0QQitemZ290035727173QQihZ019QQcategoryZ33160QQssPageNameZWDVWQQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem

      http://www.weddingwishingwells-r-us.com/index.html

19. QUESTION:
    Wedding Wishing Well?
    I am looking for ideas on making my own wedding wishing well possibly from cardboard or by recycling products maybe such as wooden pot and other bits and pieces, does anyone have any patterns or ideas on how to do this please

    • ANSWER:
      how about finding a wooden letterbox you can decorate yourself

20. QUESTION:
    i want to make a mini beach hut for my wedding wishing well… any ideas??

    • ANSWER:
      Use a bucket for the base of the well. Cover the bucket with either tan material or wood chips. Glue wood to the inside of the bucket for supports. Use heavy cardboard cut in a circle with a small slit so it can be shaped for the roof. Cover the roof in contact paper (strips) to resemble thatch. You can line the inside of the bucket with any material if desired. Good luck on you wedding, may you have many happy years together.

21. QUESTION:
    wedding wishing well?
    would you feel guilty only adding five dollars to a wedding wishing well annonomously?

    • ANSWER:
      It depends on who the wedding is for and why you would add . If it is only an aquaintance, no. If close friend or family, I would put in what I would generally spend on a present.
      However, if the reason for putting in is because you really cannot afford more, then that would be fine. (and your lucky its a wishing well and you can get away with it )

22. QUESTION:
    I need a song for the Wishing Wells (money dance) part of our wedding!?
    If you think it’s tacky or are against it, then i’m NOT talking to you so please go be bourgie and boring somewhere else…or if you just wanna post stupidity to get your points, knock yourself out…i’m not mad.

    NOW for everyone else, this is a lesbian wedding so there are 2 brides (both wearing gowns) and we are doing WISHING WELLS. I originally didn’t want my guests to feel like they had to give us money…. but most of my guests were the ones saying we should do it! So that eased my concerns and now we’re going for it!
    A “well” will be set up at both ends of the dance floor. People are welcome to contribute and then dance with us or they can just come up and dance with us. It’s all in the name of fun and tradition.

    So now i need a R& B song that everyone can dance to, old and young alike. Any classics that go with the money theme?
    thanks for the great answers so far but these are all the same answers from questions that were posted by others and they didn’t really help us (forgive the caps, i’m not yelling) I NEED R&B MUSIC, PREFERABLY CLASSICS, NOTHING SLOW, AND IF IT HELPS THIS IS A BLACK WEDDING

    • ANSWER:
      Ou will need several songs. Keep playing music, they keep dancing.

23. QUESTION:
    wedding wishing well! great idea for us but will people agree?
    we arent having a usual wedding registry, we have a house and dont need normal stuff a newly married couple do. we have spoken to our friends and they all agree with us when we say the thing we would love is a great honeymoon. I sat with my partner and came up with the idea of having a wishing well and sending a little poem card out to guests stating that we do not have a register, we are suggesting that if they want to make a contribution in dollars to our wishing well we could have the honeymoon we dream of (were in the UK) but also put if they would prefer a gift then we would love it, we just wont be putting out a register for people to pick off. do you think this is ok? my friends all seem really happy with it, but rather than just collecting money we have created a honeymoon list, with excursions/ activities on that we would love to do such as swim with dolphins, massages etc. i think tht makes it a bit more like they are contributing to a memorable experience not just funding our meals and drinks! what do you think? we will have a secured wishing well at the wedding reception for all cards/ money and also space next to it for any presents people bring, is this ok??

    i really dont want to offend and the people i have spoken to seem happy, just wondering if the majority agree
    Just to confirm: we are not asking our guests for money, we are pointing out that if they wish to get a gift that an excusrsion on our holiday would be preffered. we do note that there is no need to bring a gift, i would not expect anyone to feel like the HAVE to bring something, not going to haave bouncers on the door frisking people before they enter! i think people who are against this arent getting the right end of the stick.. well not all of the stick anyways.
    under no circumstances am i asking for money, under no circumstances am i telling people they HAVE to bring money, and under no circumstances would i be offended if i had that request givento me from a friend.
    seafoam green – none of these people who think its tacky are coming to my wedding so what does it really matter, this is only an opinion, and when people start to be cruel about it then it shows their bitterness.
    and as for registering, we are not registering with a honeymoon registry or any sort of registry, so how can it be tacky? im doing as all you haters say, ot registering (there was never a plan to register) and i certainly dont go round to people and say ‘i need money for my wedding present’ our honeymoon is paid for!

    • ANSWER:
      We did this for our wedding – have a look at http://www.OurWishingWell.com – it provides a professional and elegant way to ask for guests to contribute toward the things you would like.

      You can see some poems here:

      http://www.ourwishingwell.com/Pages/poems

24. QUESTION:
    What are some idea’s for a wishing well at a wedding?
    I bought a wishing well at the store the other day that was made out of paper, after putting it together it looked really bad. I am looking for ideas of where to purchase a wishing well or a great easy way to make a wishing well. This is going to be for my wedding for the cards. Any ideas?

    • ANSWER:
      I agree, the card board wishing wells look great on the package, but they are a pain to put together and don’t look so great when you are done. You could use some tape, lace and glue to make it look better since you already purchased it. (I’ve done this in a pinch!)

      I would suggest to instead go to your local party store and look for an alternative.

      They do make decorative cubes for the cards. Some look like birdcages, some are decorated with satin and lace.

      I’m sure you will find something!

      Good luck!

25. QUESTION:
    Wishing well wedding poem ending?
    Hi I would like to complete this poem I am putting together to ask for monetary gifts in a nice way for my weeding but I dont know how.
    The poem goes as follows:

    To save you looking, shopping, or buying
    Here is an idea we hope you like trying
    Come to our wedding to wish us both well
    And throw and envelope in our wishing well
    Fill it with paper all colores will do
    Green is our favorite but others will do

    Then from here I dont know to end it!

    Help PLeaseee!!!

    • ANSWER:
      Guests are not required to bring gifts and to ask for money out in the open instead is just rude. You should try spreading it around through rumor and family. Tell your parents who can spread it throughout the family. People will not find it rude if they hear it from someone else as an idea and go along with it. That way they will not feel pressured. Also most do not like to give money because they do not have much to give especially in this economy and it embarrasses them. I would just be greatful they bring anything. Your wedding is about more than money and gifts.

26. QUESTION:
    This guy Ive been seeing for 6 months,invited me to his best friend’s wedding.How much to put in wishing well?
    This guy Ive been seeing for 6 months, invited me to his best friend’s wedding. Me and my boyfriend, his best friend and fiance have spent time together for about 3 times in total

    How much should I put in the wishing well?

    • ANSWER:
      Nothing. Miss Manners is appalled by the use of a wedding wishing well and it’s not a requirement to contribute.

27. QUESTION:
    Wishing well wedding?
    Hi, we are having a wishing well wedding. We have prepared a wishing well box and we don’t exactly know where we have to put the box. Is there a specific place it has to be kept?

    • ANSWER:
      On the gift table next to the sign in book…

28. QUESTION:
    Is it rude not to put money in a wishing well at a wedding?
    If you have to pay for your own drinks at the reception?

    • ANSWER:
      No. It is rude to have a “Wishing Well” (I assume it is a well that you throw money in) and it is rude to make guests pay for their own drinks at a wedding.

      Are people serious?? When did weddings become such a greedfest?! If people want to save money, just elope and have a great honeymoon or save for the down payment on a home. No, instead people want to throw a lavish party to impress and entertain everyone, but then they send out registry info and have money dances and Wishing Wells and want to ask peole to give them cash. I don’t get it. “We want to throw a party but we want people to give us gifts and money so we can recoup as much of the cost of the party as possible.” So, so strange.

29. QUESTION:
    Is it rude to not put money in a wishing well at a wedding?
    Especially when the reception involves paying for your own drinks?

    • ANSWER:

30. QUESTION:
    Help! I need to hire a Wedding Wishing Well in Hampshire for recieving gifts!?
    most likely money gifts we will be recieving at our wedding as we live overseas and unable to bring prezzies back with us.
    for guests to place money gifts into.
    please no unhelpful answers.

    • ANSWER:
      you cant tell guest to get wat you want you have to accept what they give********************************************

31. QUESTION:
    Wishing well wedding? Tacky?
    A wishing well wedding means you ask for gifts of cash rather than presents…is this tacky?

    • ANSWER:
      I have never heard of a wishing well wedding before, but i have heard of a wishing well being posted at the reception. The guests were not forced to put in money, but many did anyways with no problem.

      I have heard of money dances, wall of dollars, carrying saches that the guests put money in (at that type of wedding there were no presents, just cash).

      i think to specify that on an invitation is tacky though. It should be a guests choice on what they want to give to you for your wedding.

32. QUESTION:
    how to make a wedding wishing well?
    ???????

    • ANSWER:

33. QUESTION:
    Wedding Wishing well/Treasure chest verse?
    I need some help with the following verse, the purpose of this verse is supposed to communicate that we would prefer a donation to our treasure chest, but a gift is alright as well. The problem with the verse is the word “purchase” I would rather that be replaced with give or bring a gift, can anyone offer any better suggestions than that? The verse is as follows:

    “If you were thinking of giving a gift, to help us on our way.
    A gift of cash towards our
    house, would really make our day.
    However, if you prefer to purchase
    a gift, feel free to surprise us in
    your own way.”
    But most important we
    ask for your blessing
    on our special day
    The purpose of the wishing well isn’t to buy us a house, we already have a house, we just don’t need toasters, kettles etc, we need more significant household objects, such as a dressing table, thus the wishing well.

    • ANSWER:
      .You should never ask for anything.Someone should throw you a shower and still you never mention money.Sorry hon.Bad etiquette.It’s call being gracious.

34. QUESTION:
    How do you let your wedding guests know that you want a wishing well instead of gifts.?
    I am helping do wedding invitations. How does she let her guests know that she would rather have a wishing well instead of gifts. Should I place that info on the actual invitation after the line advising them of the reception immediately following? (Everything is going to be done in the same hall just in different rooms) She doesn’t have separate cards with the reception information.

    • ANSWER:
      What? The bride wants money instead of five crystal vases, three crock pots, two coffee makers, four popcorn poppers, a set of bright orange and purple towels, a 7′X5′ turquoise macrame hanging, and grandma’s zigzag afghan? ‘Hard to imagine.

      Understandable as that is, it’s considered incredibly tacky to tell your wedding guests that you want ANYTHING, let alone that you’d prefer a “wishing well” instead of gifts. The wedding invitation is to inform guests that the bride, groom and their parents will be honored to have their presence (not presents) to share in the joy of their marriage. Period.

      The only way to “get the word out,” if you will, is by word of mouth, and only by close family or friends who happen to be asked if there’s anything the bride and groom would especially like. Yes, of course you can expect that guests will bring gifts, but suggesting that they bring cash to a wedding will result in quite a few disapproving thoughts . . . and ultimately significantly less monetary value gifts.

      The only exception to this guideline is if you are throwing a shower for the bride, and as the shower-giver, you could suggest that the “theme” of the shower is a wishing well or a money tree.

      Other than that, any mention of this wish from the bride or groom would be socially taboo.

35. QUESTION:
    Im getting married in June. Is it wrong to have a “wishing well” wedding and the “dollar dance”?? HELP ME
    Also in question, we are wondering how “wrong” it would be to ask the guests to byob. We will be providing dinner and keg beer, if they want any other type of alcohol, we are asking them to bring this as well. Are we asking for too much?? Which should i give up and which one should we stick with? We are the only 2 contributing to our wedding and we are paying for our honeymoon as well, we need to save money as much as we can. Please advice!!

    • ANSWER:
      Wishing wells are regional, so if people in your area do them you can go ahead. Same goes for the dollar dance. If they are a wedding staple where you are from do it. If you havent seen these at weddings, dont do them. Unless your guests are used to them they will find them highly offensive. (in my area if you tried to pull a dollar dance the guests would leave)

      Also, no, you shouldnt do BYOB its not in very good taste. What you have is what you have, people will be happy with it. If its just a keg and sodas, then people will have a great time with beer and cokes all night.

36. QUESTION:
    wishing well wording on wedding invitation?
    like most couples these days, we are having a wishing well at our wedding. we are hoping to raise enough money to have a nice honeymoon. but i hate those tacky poems which take 12 lines to say in a round about way, “we just want money!” i want to keep it polite but short, sweet and straight to the point, beating around the bush is just not my style.

    i was thinking of just printing at the bottom of the invitation ” to help us along on our honeymoon, a wishing well will be placed at the reception.”

    what are your thoughts, any suggestions?

    • ANSWER:
      Leave it off the invitation all together! If your guests plan on bringing you a monetary gift they will without you having to ask for it. They will assume there will be at least a card box so there is no need to specify an additional place to drop money into. If you want your guests to get the hint that you only want monetary gifts then do not register anywhere. They will know what that means without being tacky and asking for cash.

37. QUESTION:
    When giving the gift of money for a ‘wishing well’ at a wedding, what do you do?
    Do you give a regular wedding card to the couple with the cash inside? Or put in an envelope on its own…? Help!!

    • ANSWER:
      Wishing wells are tacky and you have no obligation to use it. if you were going to give cash in a card, do that. If you want to buy them a gift, do that. You could also get them a gift card. It is a GIFT, something nice you are doing for them, they can tell you what they would prefer but you are under no obligation to listen.

38. QUESTION:
    How much should I put in the wishing well at a friend’s wedding?
    NOTE: I am also being asked to help with beverages for the event.

    • ANSWER:
      Put what you can afford. If that is a couple bucks or a thousand, either way, it is a gift. If, however, you have gotten the couple gifts for either a bachelor/bachelorette party or a wedding shower, I would not feel too compelled to put much (if any) in given that you’ve already given a gift and are also being asked to help with beverages. There does come a point that things become over-done because no one thinks it’s OK to draw a line…they think it makes them “cheap” or a bad friend. But, if you’ve given a gift and are helping at the wedding or reception, that is where the line should be drawn IMO.

39. QUESTION:
    Wishing well at wedding…………..?
    what are your ideas on wishing wells? so instead of people getting us gifts we are not going to use we are going to use a wishing well as we would love a new sofa but dont want to ask for things in particular, however people can then just make donations if they like. I know asking for money is seen as rude but these days alot of people do give money right?
    thankx
    personally i think its ruder to give people a list of things you want from say john lewis or another department store.
    amber: thats a gorgeous idea! im glad i gave you some inspiration whens you wedding? hope it goes fab

    • ANSWER:
      This is a FAB idea!!! I assume you’re from the UK since you said John Lewis? Asking for money here isn’t so bad now – a lot of my friends are doing it and add a little note into their invites explaining that they’d rather have the money towards a larger investment and there’s been no concerns at all from guests.

      Maybe consider a smaller registry for things you DO need (linens or such) for those who don’t want to give money, and that way they have a choice. You never know, they may chip into the well too on the night!

      Can I ‘pinch’ this idea? It’s great! I was thinking it may be nice to have guests write out ‘wishes’ for us to throw in – like a unique guest book!

      Have a fab wedding!!!

      P.S If you are from UK did you know some travel agents let you have a ‘registry’ there too now? So you can ‘chip into’ a couple’s honeymoon? My friend had nearly all her honeymoon paid for before the wedding day using her local travel agents!

40. QUESTION:
    HOW DO i MAKE A HOMEMADE WISHING WELL FOR A WEDDING?

    • ANSWER:
      I would start by looking at a few different designs and pick a simple one. Google images should give you lots of ideas. You could use a box for the base and one cut on opposite corners for the roof. The second link below has plans for all the pieces that could be made in cardboard rather than wood. Good luck.

41. QUESTION:
    Wishing well for gifts of money for the wedding?
    My daughter and her fiance are getting married in November. They want to have a wishing well where friends can put money in an envelope instead of gifts. My question is how would you word this on the invitation?
    no the wedding is already paid for and i guess they are just trying to save there guests from hunting for a pressie…bridal registrys are accepted ……aren’t they the same thing?

    • ANSWER:
      hi..it is perfectly fine to do this..i have recently sent out my wedding invitations and also included a poem for the wishing well.i did this on a separate sheet of paper and cut them out with scolloped scissors and decorated them with hearts.the first poem is the one i had for my poem and i also have a few more for you.
      hope this helps you out and best of luck xo

      my poem
      More than just kisses so far we’ve shared
      Our home has been made with love and care
      Most things we need we’ve already got
      Like a toaster and kettle, pans and pots

      A wishing well we thought would be great
      (but only if you wish to participate)
      A gift of money is placed in the well
      Then make a wish … but do not tell

      Once we’ve replaced the old with the new
      We can look back and say it was thanks to you!

      And in return for your kindness we’re sure
      that one day soon you’ll get what you wished for!

      HERE ARE A FEW MORE FOR YOU.
      They have their dishes and towels for two
      They have pots and pans and oven mitts too
      So what do you get for the Bride & Groom
      Whose house is setup in every room?
      Their house needs repairs and some upgrades too
      But you can not register for carpet and glue.
      A well that holds wishes is the way to go
      So lets make it easy for all that know.
      An envelope will be provided for those who have room,
      To give a monetary wish to the Bride and Groom
      A wishing well will be on display at the reception hall
      To attach your wishes, for the couple, with love from all.
      —————————————————————————–
      Our home is quite complete now,
      We’ve been together long.
      So please consider our request,
      And do not take us wrong.
      A delicate request it is,
      We hope you understand.
      Please play along, as it will give
      Our married life a hand.

      The tradition of the wishing well,
      Is one that’s known by all.
      Go to the well, toss in a coin
      And as the coin does fall.
      Make a wish upon that coin,
      And careful as you do.
      Cause as the well’s tradition goes,
      Your wishes will come true.

      So on this special day or ours,
      The day that we’ll be wed.
      Don’t hunt for special gifts
      But give money is it’s stead.
      And as you drop the envelope,
      With money great and small,
      Remember, make your wish
      As you watch your money fall
      ——————————————————————–
      The tradition of the wishing well
      used on the wedding day,
      is here both for your money gifts
      and for what you would like to say.

      So please drop in a token of love
      for this special Groom & Bride,
      as they start their life united by God
      to live forever side by side.
      ————————————————————————–
      Soon you will hear our wedding bell,
      As Friends and family wish us well.
      Our household thoughts are not brand new,
      We have twice the things we need for two.
      Since we have our share of dishes and bedding,
      We’re having instead a wishing well wedding.
      But more important we ask of you,
      your prayers of love and blessings too!
      —————————————————————————-
      This wishing well is here today for family and friends. Take an
      envelope, make a wish and please drop it in. As it falls into the
      well your wish, for the couple, will come true. A token for the
      couple, to help them begin, will be welcomed, too. Please take the
      time to make a wish before the day is through.
      ——————————————————————————————
      Now we are to be Mr & Mrs
      We don’t need a wedding list of dishes
      we have two kettles, two toasters, two microwaves
      We require a house for which we have to save.
      If you would like to give us a gift,
      A cheque or vouchers would give us a lift
      We like to think of it as our ‘Wishing Well’
      Which will be filled with your love, we can tell.
      ——————————————————————————-
      Our home is quite complete now,
      we’ve been together long,
      so please consider our request and do not take us wrong.
      A delicate request it is, we hope you understand.
      Please play along as it will give our married life a hand.
      The tradition of the wishing well is one that’s known by all.
      Go to the well, toss in a coin and as the coin does fall,
      Make a wish upon that coin and careful as you do.
      Cause as the well’s tradition goes your wishes will come true.
      So on this special day of ours, the day that we’ll be wed.
      Don’t hunt for special gifts but give money in it’s stead.
      And as you drop the envelope with money great and small,
      Remember, make your wish as you watch your money fall.

      ————————————————————————————————
      “We’ve been together a few years now;
      we have pots and pans and linen and towels;
      we have glasses and toasters, really quite a few;
      so instead of more gifts, we suggest this to you;
      if it doesn’t offend and it

42. QUESTION:
    Anybody know how to make a Wishing Well for my wedding, or know any sites that will tell me how to make it?

    • ANSWER:
      Wishing wells are for showers, not weddings. But you can rent them at party stores.

      I saw this wishing well for a wedding on a show and it was neat. The couple had a wishing well carved out of ice and provided a crystal bowl with pennies in it. As guests passed by during the night they tossed a penny in the well and made a wish for the couple.

43. QUESTION:
    wishing well at a wedding?
    We are having a wishing well but I do not know how you do it. Has anyone been to a wedding where there was a wishing well and how was it done?

    • ANSWER:
      Im doing a wishing well too. I printed up some cute cards with poems on them explaining the wishing well, but according to everyone on here that was rude. So I left the cards out but I suppose they will get the point haha. If not I have a cute card box and centerpiece

44. QUESTION:
    Does anyone know please the wedding poems for having a wishing well and for having lottery tickets as a favor?

    • ANSWER:
      By wishing well I think you mean you prefer money to gifts? I do as well, but I’ve heard that it’s very rude to ask for it in any way. The best way I’ve heard is to let your wedding party and mom know that it is what you prefer and let them spread the word.

      I’ve been to a wedding where they used lottery tickets as favours and I thought it was pretty neat.

45. QUESTION:
    Making a wishing well for my wedding?
    Anyone know how to make you own wishing well? If so can you forward me directions? Is it cheaper to do this then buy or rent one?
    also how soon do you send out invites when you have a procrastinating rsvp family! Ive already sent out my save the dates! im getting married Nov. 19th

    • ANSWER:
      I made my stepdaughter’s wishing well and it came out GORGEOUS!!! It was sooo easy to make…I started with a large planter pot that looked like a picket fence (but you can get anything that jumps out at you)…the pot cost about at Wal-Mart. Then I got two pieces of styrofoam rectangles for the roof & hot glued them together. I found sheer fabric in her colors and covered the roof with the fabric & used pear pins to secure it to the styrofoam. Then I used wooden dowels to attach the roof to the pot. *voila*! I covered the dowels with ribbon and beads and draped flowers along the edge of the pot. It’s so easy to do and much more beautiful than the ones for rent. Best part is that the bride & groom have the planter pot to use in their home afterwards!

46. QUESTION:
    In lieu of guestbook for wedding, we want a wishing tree. What would work for this?
    We want to have a small tree or branches in a pot, with cards for guests to hang their well-wishes and names. We would keep the tree or plant if possible, and scrapbook the cards with the well-wishes.

    I just don’t know what to get for this. We just need a small tree with lots of branches, or just potted branches. But how much do these things cost? What would look the nicest?

    • ANSWER:
      You might look for a potted ficus tree –they have a lot of branches and small green leaves. Some have braided trunks that are rather attractive. They run anywhere from to over 0 depending on the size and the store you buy them from. Norfolk Island Pines are attractive too (the ones that look like upside down Christmas trees. Same price range.

      Another option would be to make an artificial tree: get large full bare branches from a dead tree or some that were pruned from a tree, spray paint them white or silver and place them in a heavy pot with plaster to weight it and decorative gravel on top. Then string the branches with tiny glittery lights. You could also add silk flowers for a little color. You could wire or glue mini wooden clothespins to the branches (you can get these in craft stores) so the guest can easily attach their cards.

      Having people clip the things to a live tree might be a little rough on the tree itself.

47. QUESTION:
    Wishing well in a wedding?
    I recently went to a wedding where the bride and groom didn’t ask for material gifts but they asked for monetary gifts.. in this case putting money in a ‘wishing well’.

    This is the first time i’ve seen and heard of such a thing. I’m not sure whether i like the idea or not. I don’t really like asking for money.

    Would you have a wishing well in your wedding or stick with receiving gifts? Why or why not?

    (For the record: I’m not married)

    • ANSWER:
      We had a wishing well at our wedding. But traditionally for our family it does not imply needing to give a monetary gift, it is for “well wishes” or Cards of congradulations. If our guest had given us money that was their doing, and not our asking, and we greatly appreciated it. I think it is impolite to ask for money in that matter.

48. QUESTION:
    Please help I need a wishing well poem for my wedding in August.?
    I am getting married in the UK where I am from and cant bring gifts back on the flight so need a wishing well poem explaining this. Can anyone help pls. thank you

    • ANSWER:
      go onto these websites site i’m doing a wishing well also

      these have helped me

49. QUESTION:
    Best Wishes Wedding Well?
    My sister is getting married in a few weeks and she is having a “Best Wishes” wishing well. This is NOT for guests to put money in but simply they write a best wish to the newly wed couple and put it in the “wishing well”. Where can I find wishing well verses to let people know what it is she wants them to do? She is going with a fall theme so anything in that area would be helpful, but of course, any versus would be great.

    • ANSWER:
      I would set the wishing well by the guest book and have someone standing there making sure everyone signs in and then they can tell them that the couple would like them to wright a best wish for them and put it in the well. This way you know everyone knows about it and has the opportunity to put theirs in.

      Here are a few verses I thought of as well-We set up this well to ask a favor from you. Please no money just a wish will do. Please wright us a wish you would like to come true. Place it in the well for us to view after we come back from our honeymoon.

      This wishing well is here today for family and friends.
      To make a wish for us on our special day.

50. QUESTION:
    I have rose peddles that are frabic and I need to put them on a wishing well which is cardboard for a wedding?

    Thanks I am using a hot glue gun and it seems to be holding the peddles on

    • ANSWER:
      Are you wanting to stick the petals onto the well to make it look like a flower? not really sure want you want to do. but you could use a hot glue gun and layer the petals around to outside of the well. here are some ideas:

      http://www.weddingaccessories.net/-strse-2872/wishing-well-card-holder/Detail.bok

      it looks like they just glued the petals in layers on this tissue box but it gives you the basic idea:

      http://www.silkflowersplus.com/product/search_product.asp?status=post&sub_category_id=32